By Nong Skett, founder of luxury travel consultancy Travelnam
For years, we’ve been encouraged to choose our holidays by destination. We scroll through beautiful beaches, bookmark boutique hotels and build wish lists of places we’ve always dreamed of visiting.
But what if we’ve been planning our holidays the wrong way?
Instead of asking, Where do I want to go?, perhaps the better question is:
How do I want to feel when I come home?
It’s a subtle shift in thinking, but one that can completely transform the way we travel.
According to luxury travel consultant Nong Skett, founder of boutique consultancy Travelnam, the most memorable holidays aren’t always the ones with the biggest budget or the busiest itinerary. They’re the ones that arrive at exactly the right moment in our lives.
Travel should meet you where you are
Life rarely slows down on its own.
Many of us spend our days balancing careers, families and endless to-do lists, only booking a holiday once we feel completely exhausted. Often, we choose somewhere because it’s trending, because we’ve seen it on social media or because it’s been sitting on our bucket list for years.
But our travel choices should evolve alongside us.
Someone recovering from burnout will need something very different to someone celebrating a milestone birthday. A couple looking to reconnect may find greater joy in a peaceful vineyard than a busy city, while a solo traveller craving inspiration could come home feeling completely renewed after immersing themselves in local art, food and culture.
The destination matters, but the feeling you hope to experience matters even more.
The luxury of slowing down
Somewhere along the way, luxury became associated with doing more.
More destinations.
More excursions.
More reservations.
More photographs.
Yet some of the most memorable holidays are often the simplest.
There’s something wonderfully indulgent about waking without an alarm, wandering through a local market with nowhere particular to be, lingering over lunch because the conversation is too good to leave, or returning to the same café simply because it already feels familiar.
The moments we remember most rarely appear on an itinerary.
Every destination has its own rhythm
Some places naturally invite adventure.
Others encourage reflection.
Before booking your next holiday, think about the atmosphere you’re hoping to immerse yourself in.
If you’re craving creativity, perhaps it’s the galleries of Florence or artisan workshops tucked away in Kyoto.
If your body and mind are asking for rest, a secluded coastal retreat or lakeside escape may offer exactly the pause you’ve been longing for.
For travellers seeking connection, destinations where meals become long conversations and local traditions remain at the heart of daily life often provide the richest experiences.
Sometimes choosing the right destination is less about ticking somewhere off a list and more about finding somewhere that reflects what you need right now.
Luxury isn’t always about spending more
One of the biggest misconceptions about luxury travel is that it simply means spending more money.
In reality, true luxury is often found elsewhere.
It’s the hotel that remembers your name.
The guide who introduces you to places you would never have discovered alone.
The extra night spent fully experiencing one destination rather than rushing between three.
Exceptional service, thoughtful planning and genuine personalisation often leave a far greater impression than marble bathrooms or oversized suites.
Leave space for the unexpected
No matter how carefully a trip is planned, the best travel experiences often happen by accident.
A tiny restaurant recommended by a local.
A hidden courtyard filled with live music.
A sunset you hadn’t planned to see.
The best itineraries don’t eliminate spontaneity.
They leave room for it.
The memories that stay with us
Years later, we rarely remember exactly what we ordered for dinner or what colour the hotel cushions were.
Instead, we remember how a place made us feel.
The confidence that came from travelling somewhere unfamiliar.
The calm of switching off our phones for an afternoon.
The conversations we never expected to have.
The feeling of returning home just a little lighter than when we left.
Those are the memories that stay with us long after the suitcase has been unpacked.
A more thoughtful way to travel
Luxury travel is changing.
Today’s travellers are increasingly looking beyond five-star hotels and famous landmarks in search of something more meaningful: experiences that feel personal, restorative and genuinely memorable.
As Nong Skett explains, planning a holiday should begin with understanding what you need from it, not simply where you want to go.
Because sometimes the perfect destination isn’t the one everyone else is talking about.
It’s simply the one that gives you exactly what you needed, even before you realised you were looking for it.
About the contributor
Nong Skett is the founder of boutique travel consultancy Travelnam, where she designs bespoke journeys centred on meaningful experiences, exceptional service and genuine cultural connection. Drawing on her background in corporate travel, she believes true luxury is defined not by price, but by thoughtful personalisation, allowing clients to return home feeling enriched, inspired and transformed.
